Thankfulness

It has been great studying Colossians this semester. It also seemed like perfect timing to be talking through thankfulness with Thanksgiving this week.

Paul speaks about thankfulness several times throughout the book of Colossians. He often pairs being thankful with instruction for prayer. It is so easy to go to God with a laundry list of things we need, and forget to thank God for all He has given us. In Colossians 2:6-7 NIV, Paul says, "So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." This encourages me to ask the question: Am I overflowing with thankfulness?

As we celebrate this holiday weekend, challenge yourself to be thankful for all that God has done for us.

"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."  Colossians 3:17 NIV

"Sex is a ministry" ...and other things I've learned at seminary.

As a TWF small group leader, I have learned the power of being vulnerable and “going first” when it comes to sharing personal things. I experienced this at a recent small group gathering when I shared a rather intimate prayer request. As I talked, I sensed a collective sigh of relief from the women around the room. Many wives told me later, “Thank you for sharing that...” or “Me, too…” This deep chord would not have been struck among us if someone hadn’t gone first. I suppose this blog post is also me “going first.”

My intimate prayer request that night? Pray for my sex life.

I’ve often heard it said that we need to speak more openly, more frankly, more frequently about sex in the Church.

Well, let’s do it.

As I started praying about my sex life, God led me to His Word…that source of comfort and Truth that always seems to have the answers when I have nothing. Guess which book He drew me to?

Yep. Song of Solomon.

And this is the moment when I wish this was not a blog; not a screen you’re just reading; not another article you might stumble upon today. Instead, I wish I could make you a mug of something warm and yummy, offer you the other chair at my tiny kitchen table, crack open my favorite old study Bible, and talk face-to-face, friend-to-friend, about what God opened my eyes to. For now, this measly post will have to do. Turn to Song of Solomon, Chapter 4 J.

Now, I’m not here to argue my specific interpretation of this book or explain the depths of Hebrew poetry (I’ll leave that to our husbands!), but I just have to tell you about these verses.  Chapter 4 appears to be the wedding night between the Lover and his Beloved, and it opens with the man’s poetic, gushing, heartfelt description of his new bride. This Lover makes Mr. Darcy look like a chump, as he waxes eloquently with phrases like, “All beautiful you are, my darling, there is no flaw in you…” (v. 7) and “You have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes…” (v. 9). Cue the swooning, ladies!

At the end of this detailed description of her, he draws out a few specific images that are important…images that spoke to me and convicted me. Perhaps they’ll do the same for you. In verses 12 and 15, he describes her as a “garden locked up,” “a spring enclosed,” “a garden fountain,” and “a well of flowing water.” All of these images communicate that she is a source of refreshment that belongs to him alone.

 She quenches something in him, and she is exclusively his.

Also, the water analogies of fountains and springs show that, not only does she refresh him, but her refreshment is the very best. In that land and climate, springs and fountains were the purest, most delicious and satisfying forms of water available. It’s the difference between an old bottle of water left in your hot car and a clean, fresh glass of ice cold water. Give me the ice water any day, right?! Let’s also take note that these water analogies carried both taste and sound imagery; how relaxing and delightful is the sound of a bubbling brook! That’s the picture he paints of her…that’s what she does to him.

Indulge me, here, and let me tell you about one more observation that struck me (take another sip from your warm mug, because we’re going somewhere!). These garden, fountain, flowing water descriptions sandwich verses 13 and 14, where he lists various things found in her “orchard of pomegranates” (like cinnamon, myrrh, nard, henna, saffron, etc). Ok, so get this…the word “orchard” in verse 13 comes from the Hebrew word that we get “paradise” from.

Did you know that? I didn’t!

When the Lover uses the words “orchard” or “garden,” the picture is more of a park or forest; not the neat, straight rows, weed-pulling, sprouting seedlings, or cute harvest décor that can flash through our minds with the words “orchard” or “garden.” Instead, he compares her to a romantic, heavenly forest with plenty of nooks and crannies, meadows and glens, where new beauties can be discovered and enjoyed. Also, the “plants” in her “orchard of pomegranates” are very sensual and aromatic. His list is mostly perfumes…smells. She is a sensory experience for him, and she overwhelms him. (Just ask your husband what the scent of your favorite perfume does to him!)

His beautiful description of her ends, and the Beloved responds to him, in verse 16, with an invitation for him to enjoy her. I don’t know about you, but when my husband gushes about me or tells me how beautiful I am, an invitation is not always my reply. Sometimes, my response is “Guh! I just worked all day and didn’t have time to shower…no, thank you, hunny.”

“Awake, north wind! Blow on my garden!” is not always my gut reaction.

Predictably, the Lover accepts this invitation and moves toward her (5:1). Again, this is described using language that invokes sensory overload: distinct, luxurious aromas…rich, delicious food…thick, creamy drinks. Yum. J

Immediately after he moves toward her (you get the gist that they do, indeed, make love), the Friends or Others chime in and encourage them. The ESV actually uses the phrase, “be drunk with love.” Song of Solomon is obviously a poetic genre, but it’s interesting that the Bible would encourage us to be intoxicated! Right on! Let’s lose control and get completely smashed…with ecstasy over our husbands!

Alright, observations over. You can close your Bible now, friend. Let’s talk…

As I worked through these passages and prayed about my sex life, God opened my eyes to something profound. He highlighted it again this week as a pastor’s wife taught at our TWF Large Group gathering:

Sexual pleasure is a ministry that I have to my husband that no one else has.

He can have a cup of coffee and deep conversation with anyone...he can hear a convicting sermon from any good speaker…he can worship in song with any old hymn.

But God has entrusted ME and me ALONE with the privilege…nay, the responsibility to minister to my husband and love him in this way. I am his enclosed garden, full of delights (no matter how I might view myself).

I am the only fountain he’s allowed to drink from.

And sometimes…like in these last 4 weeks before finals when I barely see him…it is a ministry. It is a choice to say, “No, honey, we haven’t gotten to share our hearts, and you haven’t been romantic or brought me flowers, and there’s not time to find a babysitter and have a date night. But I’m going to respect and honor the way God has made you…as a man who is physiologically different from me in ways I don’t always understand! I’m going to love you selflessly and minister to you in this way.”

Does that excuse the lack of flowers? Umm…NO!

Does that mean it’s ok for the romance to be missing? No way!

Sexual pleasure is a two-way street in which he is called to minister to me, too. Thoughtful notes, candlelight, deep emotional connection, and long, drawn-out love-making will not (must not!) be shoved on the back burner of life and forgotten about.

What I’m saying is that when those crazy weeks hit and our dear husbands are under immense stress, it is an act of service and selflessness on our part to engage them sexually and meet their needs.

But oh, friend, I am just scratching the surface with this post. There’s so much more that should be said. There isn’t room here to dig deeply into this topic, which is a real shame.

Because, frankly, sex in marriage is hard. It can be an area of pain, guilt, conflict, and depending on the season of life you’re in (pregnancy, menopause, new baby), sex is just plain CHALLENGING. C’mon now, I’m 29 weeks pregnant with a toddler at home…let’s talk about sex being difficult! J

If you’re struggling in this area, don’t allow it to go unaddressed. Communicate with your husband, and be honest about what’s really going on. Don’t be afraid to talk to someone you trust. My tiny kitchen table is open, for what it’s worth.

And maybe, in the midst of exegesis papers and final exams, grocery lists and holiday preparations,  this long-winded blog post was what you needed to hear…a little word from the Maker of sex, the Giver of all good gifts, the One who holds your marriage together. Maybe it’s the nudge you need to stop washing the clothes and start taking off your clothes. To let dinner get cold while you get other things hot. To send him an email that simply reads: “Naked. Come home. Now.”. To capitalize on nap time by heading to bed yourselves. 

Drink your fill, friend! And let’s get drunk with love!

 

 

 

 

Renee Gowler and her husband, Alex, moved to Trinity in the fall of 2012. They live on campus with their 18 month old son, Zeke, and are expecting a baby girl in February. Alex is pursuing his MDiv, while Renee works full-time as a momma and part-time as a personal assistant/housekeeper for a local family. She leads an on-campus Bible study with the Trinity Wives Fellowship and loves being part of such a diverse, Christ-centered community of women. Her favorite things include: baking chocolate chip cookies, quoting Lord of the Rings with her husband, tickling Zeke, and journaling to Jesus.

 

The Clothes Horse

"In Christ we serve to meet the physical needs of Trinity Evangelical Divinity School and Graduate students and their families."

The Clothes Horse is a small thrift store on the Trinity campus. We provide clothes, toy, food and small household items free of charge to all graduate students and their families.  Faculty wives began this ministry nearly 30 years ago  and it is stronger today than ever before.  Each week many families are blessed to find just what they need at the Clothes Horse.

Following God's call to prepare for ministry is a leap of faith.  Students and their families take oon many financial burdens in order to pursue graduate studies at Trinity.  Tuition and living costs are expensive, and a full course load leaves little time to earn money.  many students are also responsible for a spouse, children, or a church.  We have numerous international students in our Trinity community, for whom adjusting to the American economy can be a struggle.

The ministry of the Clothes Horse is make possible by the work of many people.  A committee of three faculty wives oversees the entire operation.  A student manager assists in the care of administrative tasks and running the store on a daily basis.  Trinity college and graduate students work oat the store to fulfill volunteer and internship requirements.  Additional volunteers from both the campus community and area churches cover regular shirts, waiting on customers and sorting items.

Hours:

Tuesdays 9:30 a.m. - 3:30 p.m. (Extended hours: 3:30-5:30 p.m. 1st Tuesday of every month)

Thursday 9:30 a.m. - 11: 30 a.m.

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Currently on the food shelves, there are several cans of sweet potatoes. Lily from our welcoming committee has provided a few favorite recipes from her Indonesian culture. Go visit the Clothes Horse and try out one of these great recipes!

Sweet Potato in Coconut Mild Dessert Soup (Kolak Ubi)

1 can of cubed sweet potatoes (include the syrup)
1/2 can of coconut milk
2-3 lumps of cane sugar (piloncillo) or more according to taste
1 tsp cinnamon powder or one piece of cinnamon bark
1/2 tsp salt

Mix everything together and bring to a boil. Remove from fire and serve warm, or cold with ice
Note: you can add ripe plantain, cubed.

Sweet Potato Balls (Bola Ubi)

1-2 cans of cubed sweet potatoes, drained and mashed
1 cup of tapioca or corn starch
2 Tbs brown sugar
a dash of salt

Mix all ingredients together and shape into balls. Deep fry the balls until golden brown and crispy. Serve immediately.

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If you are interested in volunteering, doing a special project, donating items, or have any qeustions about the Clothes Horse, please call the store at 847-317-8182. Thi swill put you in contact with the manager or a committee member.

Would you like to share a story, article, or recipe on the TWF Crowns blog? Email us at twfcrowns@gmail.com. Do you have questions about TWF, Mom's Ministry, or Bible Study? Email us at twf@tiu.edu.

Juggling Life & Enjoying God

By Renata Lee

You know you’re a Trinity wife living on campus if you’ve learned how to carry ten or more grocery bags, your purse, your mail, and a coffee to your apartment at one time so you don’t have to make a second trip to the car.  I was recently sitting in my car and witnessed two other Trinity wives doing this minutes before I did the very same thing.  I just chuckled to myself as my arms were about to fall off as I neared the top of the stairs. 

In all seriousness though, you rock Trinity wives!  I pray this brief blog will encourage your heart and passion for the Lord and your ministry.  I’m more and more convinced that Trinity wives are amongst the world’s busiest people: some work full-time to support the fulfillment of their husband’s vocational training, others are full-time career mothers, raising up the next generation to love Jesus with incredible passion, and some do both!  We do the laundry, wash dishes, wash kids, clean the house, do the accounting, grocery shop, prepare meals, run errands, pick up the kids, drop off the kids, love our husbands and children, minister to people in the church and community, and do countless other important tasks unique to each one of us.

Enjoying God

May I encourage you with these words from our beloved Lord Jesus:  “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is easy and My burden is light” (Matt. 11:28-30). 

There are numerous truths we could gain from this passage, but the one I want to note is that as ministers with our husbands, we carry a special, unique yoke and burden.  Not our own burden, or even our husband’s burden for ministry, but the Lord’s yoke - His burden.  In this passage, Jesus promises that His yoke is “easy,” and His burden is “light.”  Is this how you feel?  If you’re anything like me, you are trying to do 1,000 things every day.  Let us examine the different types of yokes and burdens we carry during this season of ministry preparation.  Let us focus on how to find rest and refreshment for our soul, not from anyone or anything else but Christ alone.  To do this we must first and foremost vigilantly stoke and protect our first love for Jesus – this is the key to an exciting and enduring life in ministry (as well as for our marriage and parenting)!  Jesus promises that if we do these three things: (1) come to Him (2) take His yoke, and (3) learn from how Christ lived His life, then we will experience true refreshment for our soul! 

Now Go For It!

In all the ways we serve the Lord, our husband, family, and the church, let’s never forget to take the time we need to find refreshment from Christ.  He will nourish our heart, strengthening our passion and zeal for Him and our ministry, and help us thrive in the season of vocational preparation that we are in.  Be blessed Trinity wives!  You’re a special group of ladies! 

 Renata Lee and her husband, Beau, moved to Trinity at the beginning of the summer semester 2013 from Madison, WI. They live on campus and really enjoy the wonderful community of people. Beau is working on his MDiv and is the editor of the graduate campus newspaper, the Trinity Graduate Scrawl. Renata is also working on her Master's Degree in Biblical Studies online through Dallas Theological Seminary and taking online courses through Trinity. She also keeps busy managing their two businesses back in Madison, a residential and commercial cleaning firm and two music lesson studios. They are still actively involved in their church in Madison and travel back each weekend so Beau can teach the Sunday morning Bible study. Renata thoroughly enjoys being a helper to her husband, a homemaker, and encouraging the body of Christ.

MYLT - Mom's Ministry Coordinator

Meet Your Leadership Team series is a great way to get to know the leaders of TWF.  Enjoy learning a little more about the ladies leading TWF this year. Also, take note of a position that you might like for next year!

Rebekah with Silas, Mamie, and Emmett

Rebekah Hill is the Mom's Ministry Coordinator for TWF. She and her husband, Daniel, have been married for 13 years and have 3 children. Rebekah and Daniel came to TEDS 2 years ago so that Daniel could pursue his MDiv. Before moving to Illinois, the Hill's lived in the beautiful mountains of North Carolina. Rebekah would love to share more with you over a cup of coffee, just ask her :)

For wives: Rebekah says, "Unpack the boxes - literally and emotionally/spiritually. Try to embrace this TEDS experience as not only the beginning of the next adventure, but the NOW adventure that God has specifically ordained for you and your family to experience. Perspective changes everything."

Daniel and Rebekah

Would you like to share a story or article on the TWF Crowns blog? Email us at twfcrowns@gmail.com. Do you have questions about TWF or Mom's Ministry? Email us at twf@tiu.edu.

TWF Recipes to Share

With fall weather coming soon, here are a few great fall recipes to try out!

Crock Pot Chili

submitted by Sara Hutchison

1.5 lbs cooked ground beef

1 can (16 oz) tomato sauce

1.5 cups salsa

1 cup frozen corn

2 tbs chili powder

1 onion

1 can light kidney beans

1 can dark kidney beans

Mix all ingredients together in crock pot. Cook on High for 3-4 hours or on Low for 5-6 hours.

Toppings: cheese, sour cream

**Chili is always good with corn muffins too!!**

Chocolate Chip Pumpkin Muffins (only 3 ingredients!)

submitted by Sara Hutchison

2 boxes Duncan Hines spice cake mix (Do not make cake according to directions on the box, only use the cake powder as is!)
1 bag chocolate chips

1 - 30 oz can pumpkin

Mix all ingredients together. Fill muffin tin cups about 3/4 full and Bake at 350 for 25 minutes.

Tommy and Sara Hutchison

Sara Hutchison attends the Vernon Hills Small group. Her husband Tommy is in his second year pursuing his MDiv. Sara is a nurse by day but loves to cook up sweet treats in her free time!

Would you like to share a story, article or recipe on the TWF Crowns blog? Email us at twfcrowns@gmail.com. Do you have questions about TWF? Email us at twf@tiu.edu.

MYLT - Small Group Coordinator

Meet Your Leadership Team series is a great way to get to know the leaders of TWF.  Enjoy learning a little more about the ladies leading TWF this year. Also, take note of a position that you might like for next year!

James and Lauren Munoz

Lauren Munoz is the Small Group Coordinator for TWF. She and her husband James have been married for 2.5 years. James is pursuing his MDiv and plans to graduate in May. Before moving to Illinois, James and Lauren lived in Knoxville, Tennessee and will be heading back there after graduation. A super fun fact about Lauren is that before her dad was a farmer, he worked for Pillsbury and oversaw the team that developed the Toaster Strudel! He also worked for Nabisco and brought home Teddy Grahams to Lauren and her brother. They were the first kids to officially try them!

For wives: Lauren says, "Get involved! Avoiding fellowship with other women while at TEDS is a true shame! Not only will you miss out, but everyone else will miss out on the gifts, encouragement, and challenges you could bring to the table. I'm an introvert and like my alone time, but my experience at Trinity would have been miserable without TWF...especially my small group. Christian women walking through life with us is a priceless gift!"

Would you like to share a story or article on the TWF Crowns blog? Email us at twfcrowns@gmail.com. Do you have questions about TWF? Email us at twf@tiu.edu.